This blog is already making me crave all the delicious, fatty food we have pictures of today. (I devoured two Andes mints from the leftover Easter basket before I even wrote the first sentence.) I'm just warning you...
Leftover Easter Basket
(complete with a sedated-looking chocolate bunny, bubblegum eggs, Reeses minis and Andes Mints)
"Easter, that's a weird tradition. Female voice: Easter, the day Jesus rose from the dead. What should we do? Male voice: How 'bout eggs?! Female voice: Well, w-what does that have to do with Jesus? Male voice: Alright, we'll hide 'em. Female voice: I don't... I don't follow your logic. Male voice: Don't worry, there's a bunny." - Jim Gaffigan stand-up.
The idea of eating an animal shaped treat seems pretty common for the Easter holiday, from brightly-colored sugar-covered marshmallow chicks to chocolate bunnies. It just seems somewhat wrong to nom the ears off a imitation bunny that looks too sedated to defend itself. And what about the ribbon around its neck? Is it supposed to be a tie for the bunny's Sunday best or is it signaling a gift bow, welcoming someone to untie it and eat the head off? I don't get it, chocolatiers, I don't get it.
Apparently Easter got everyone back in the baking spirit though, because we have a record number of fatty work treats today. Crazy Cake Lady has returned and our lovely fans have submitted lots of delicious-looking foodporn.
CCL's Pear Upside-down Cake
Crazy Cake Lady avoided a riot when she returned today with a dense cake that took a once healthy food and made it a sugar-coated obesity contributor. We didn't get a chance to ask her where she was all last week, but we're hoping she sticks around for a while. While we try not to eat most of the treats she makes - a reason for this blog - her absence is not good for our coworker's emotional well-being.
It seems, though, if CCL were to go to baking rehab and realize her obsessive hobby is kind of odd, this blog would still flourish thanks to our fabulous readers:
Jade and Becca from Indiana submitted three delicious, Easter-inspired deserts. The deserts were made by three separate people - if they weren't I think we'd have to have a bake off between CCL and Indiana baker.
Strawberry Cheesecake
Apparently this was made by a 20-year-old baker named Adam. (No relation to our bird friend.) I heard his cheesecakes are famous around his small-Indiana town. He makes them for special occasions, holidays, and for girls he likes when he was in high school. I wish we could be so lucky.
Carrot Cake
(I don't get why half of the cake is bumpy... and umm.. Where are the orange frosting carrot-shaped decorations? No one is going to know what this is.)
Oreo Bon-bons
These look delicious, but in a way, they look like rolled up Oreos that were left in the bottom of a milk glass too long, then dipped in white chocolate. They also look like they would coat my teeth with chocolate mush in one bite.
"J" from Washington also sent us another picture from her work:
Lemon "surprise" Cake
"We have a crazy Cake Lady too, but I guess you could call her our crazy desert lady," J said in an e-mail to us. "She likes to bake, but due to being single she does not like to keep what she bakes around her house; as she does not have anyone to share the calories with. So she brings it in to the office for the rest of us to eat. Well this is just not working well for me as I'm trying to loose weight, not gain it. So I've decided every time she brings something in I'm just going to forward it to you for the blog so all your readers can share in the calories."
Awww, it's so nice when people "share" the calories. Is that how McDonald's got so popular?Ronald was just like "Hey, I make a mean hamburger, but I'm going to get obese if I eat these everyday, so I'll just "share" them with other people who could make their own healthy food, but probably won't because these hamburgers are so convenient and reek of taste bud-begging MSG."
What's the surprise? That you'll get fat if you eat too much of CDL's treats? Surprise! One slice is half your daily recommended value of calories and double the recommended sugar intake. Thanks CDL ;) Stay strong, J.
Last, but not least, @OffShoreAir tweeted us a picture a "newlywed bossman's wife made" for the office:
Death by Chocolate
We can't really tell what is in this, but Wikipedia says a dish called "Death by Chocolate" might be:
- A layered chocolate cake, with fudge, ganache or chocolate moose between the layers
- A dessert made in a trifle bowl from alternation layers of broken-up Kahlua-soaked brownies, chocolate mousse, crushed Heath bars and whipped topping
- A molten chocolate cake
- A flourless chocolate cake (sometimes called "chocolate decadence")
I'm going to guess option 2 for this one, let me know if I was close @OffShoreAir ;)
At least Newlywed Baker doesn't hide the fact that enough of her desserts will, in fact, kill you. We like that kind of honesty. CCL and CDL should take note.
Thanks for your pictures today everyone! Looks like we all feel fat today.
-Weight-gaining worker
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