We are so sorry. We wish we had a better excuse for abandoning you for a week, but we really don't. We wish we could say "our fingers got so fat from eating cake they wouldn't fit on they keyboard" or "CCL kidnapped us and made us go to Omm Yung Doe for a week" or even "Evil Pizza Man gave us food poisoning," but we don't. We've simply been either too busy, on Vegas vacations, or - for one employee - sick in bed reading the Twilight tetralogy (that means 4 in a series.) We know what you're doing sicky.
As we have abandoned you, Crazy Cake Lady has still been going about her usual business, attempting to get her doctorate degree in Cake Mixology. She's been getting better. Oh, and up-side to the plus-side; the lunchroom has moved upstairs into our old office, so we only have to walk about 10 feet to see what's hidden inside the refrigerator. Actually, that's probably a bad thing. She should keep her cakes up the hill, around the corner, over the river and at her grandma's house, where it would either make us burn calories to retrieve or make her grandma fat, not us. Oh, whatever, old people don't care about their weight.
Instead, this pink masterpiece was taunting us today:
Triple Layer Strawberry Cake
You know how your mom never told you to eat anything that isn't a natural color? I mean, strawberries are naturally pink-ish, but the neon glow in the batter is not looking kosher. It probably hasD&C Red #19 in it and we're all going to get cancer. OK, we'll be optimistic, the cake was pretty good. It tasted like pancakes with strawberries on top. Sounds like a suitable breakfast alternative to me.....sorta..not really.
We'll leave you with this mauled piece of pizza for Pizza Day. Notice how we used to like Pizza Day, now we only get a piece to pick the pepperonis off and take a picture for you. We hope you appreciate this:
Pizzzzza
...because we appreciate you. Even though we abandoned you for a week. We're sorry! We'll be here tomorrow. We promise ;D
-Weight-gaining worker
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